Thursday, October 31, 2024

quiet space

Since I stopped working I've been doing things.  Like I put new flooring in my kitchen entry and bathroom.  I pretty much redid the whole bathroom.  Julie my new (and only) wife showed me how to install vinyl plank flooring in our cabin.  Then we fixed the deck.  I had earlier painted and re-roofed both the boat house and the cabin.  I did roof while I was also doing chemo.  That wasn't the best..

Anyway, lots of time I'm just working alone. I'll go through a whole day and not really have contact with anyone as Julie lives in Canada.  We do talk, just for the record, but most of the tasks I do, I do alone. My cat Wallace does interact with me and I do talk to him for what that's worth.  I try and have as quiet of a brain as possible. I don't try I just do. I'm really good at not thinking. The kind of video that has no dialog and no soundtrack.  I realized yesterday while at the cabin alone that I'm like that guy in the video.  I took the carburetor apart several times until it stopped leaking.  No other thoughts in my head.  It was just like watching a video.  Almost like an out of body experience.. I had to accomplish that task because I needed the truck to work.

After I did that I drained the water out of the pump that feeds water to the cabin to winterize it so it won't freeze.  The same sort of experience.  Well I got both of those tasks done, then I had to travel 200 miles in the truck I fixed.  No radio, the only sound was the motor of the truck and all the noises it makes. In that situation I had to decide what noises were of concern and what ones were OK. One time there was a rattle and I finally realized that it was one of the sun visors. I just monitored the two tanks of gas the oil pressure the temp and the voltage and considered my progress towards my destination.

I could have worried about the truck the water situation in the cabin and the long drive but that wouldn't solve anything.  Frankly I did worry about the truck and the drive, but it all worked out. I always hated when someone at work was playing "their music" really loud.  It's just such pollution.  I used to like the B52s but there's only so much Love Shack I can take in one week baby..