Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Some advise

I had to tell my friend who set me up on a blind date (in a bar and sort of a get-together) that I didn't want to pursue a relationship right now with this gal. I guess she was interested in me and wanted to get back together. She was pretty and all, but I could just tell that she probably wasn't the person for me. Plus it is going to be ski season soon and I won't be traveling anywhere except the ski hill all winter. I was very clear about it. I got the impression that she couldn't understand that. I don't think she ever would.

Perhaps Lance Armstrong had the same sort of problem with his relationships, and why his wife left him and Cheryl Crow. "I'm going to race my bike all summer so I'll see you in the winter."

I have had a few girlfriends who can ski and it was a pleasure for me. But I'm not going to sit around not skiing if I have any spare time in the winter and the ski lift is running. Life is too short and I'm still improving racing. People criticize me for being single. But doesn't freedom have a value? Don't we go to war over it.

I love my friend like a brother. I've known him since I was 5 years old. But I'm not sure he understands me even yet.

Here is his advise for me;

Don, I will give you some advise. Go to a larger church. Get involved with
some singles. There are women all around that would love to meet a guy like
you. You have to hunt, as you say. Quit looking where there is not substance
(work, bars, get togethers). I would bet money that church has about the
highest percentage of good women, with morals, upbringing, viewpoints, and
love is there. Love is the main thing in the bible as well. As god says the
greatest of these things (important for us to have) is love. I try not to
get all religious, I think you will find that person, because
I think you are honing your skills. Keep doing that. Take care Don, let's
keep after this, and I will look here for you as well.

It was his idea to have a "get together" in a bar, to introduce me to this gal from his church, and I was the only one who didn't drink. (not that that matters) I hardly ever go to church. I can't say that I like going to church. I'm not sure that god knew about skis when when he told us what was important. I love skiing, so perhaps that is what he meant. Pope John Paul was an avid skiier. I thought that was cool.

My life isn't a disaster because I'm single right now despite what my friends think. I'm thankful for the effort my friend made to hook me up. I did have a good time and experience. It's about the journey, not the destination.


Anonymous said...

I got similar advice from my former-best-friend's-husband, who, in my opinion, is one of those self-rightous hypocrites who say Jesus Christ is their hero but then criticize friends and colleagues behind their back and make things in their lives more difficult if they can.

If you feel the gal isn't right, she isn't. Your friend and the girl can't force the relationship on you.

GrewUpRural said...

Do what makes you feel comfortable with yourself and nicely tell people thank you for their concerns in regards to your love life.

One thing I don't understand is why people are always encouraging/rushing other people to find somebody to date or to get married.

don said...

I think people just want single friends to have the same things/ happiness that they have, or at least be in the same situation for better or worse.

I also think it would be disingenuous of me to attend a big church just to find a date.

I'd have to be a real dog to do that. I'd see myself as the coyote in the flock of sheep, like in that cartoon.

Anonymous said...

Church for singles, what a concept. Send the idea to Rome...they might bite. Attendance has been down lately. I agree that the idea seems dishonest, unless of course you're hoping to find God AND a girlfriend.

Sounds like you are a happy bachelor so why hook up with anyone if the only one that ends up happy is your friend. What's his deal?

Have fun on the slopes! Maybe you'll find that special someone on a black diamond.