Planet redneck

It woke me up at 3:00 AM out of a deep sleep. Something banging around outside on the deck of the cabin. Bear! I thought... Great. It must have smelled my grub and wants in. Then I remember. I have my .308 rifle with me,.. but wait,.. the shells are out in the truck. I brought the rifle in but not the shells!

So I got up without turning any lights on and looked out the window. I had the windows open as it was so hot in the cabin when I hit the sack. I looked outside and saw three large bodies moving. A sow and two yearling cubs I thought. Then I coudln't see anything in the darkness. I waited and watched. Nothing but darkness. So I opened the kitchen door and went out with the mag-lite. There were several head of deer in the orchard. One of them had gotten on the deck for some reason.

So I got my camera out. I'm going to get a picture of this and show Mrs. C. I thought. Then I'll have proof that it isn't me who is raiding her orchard at night, so I took this snap.

Then I got to thinking as I crawled back in the sack,... What if some of these creatures are space aliens that come down to earth at night in the form of deer to take our fruit and abduct a select few of us to breed with?! Now that BUMPER STICKER is starting to make sense!,... I can see a whole movie script. Space alien deer come down to earth and do battle with a planet of rednecks. It could be called Deer From Outer Space, or Planet Of The Rednecks. I can hear the trailer now, "They want our fruit, but we want their meat!" (I'm going way too far with this)

And I figured out how to tell which deer are space aliens,.. They are the ones with unusual green eyes!